I think it was when I first step foot on a New York City sidewalk that I fell in love with the city. Not THE city necessarily, but city life. The bright lights, the greasy pizza, the opportunities, the chatter. Cities are perfect for introverts because you can hide. I wanted to live somewhere where everybody didn’t know my name.
“When you don’t seem to run on either side of the fence. People act like you don’t make sense. These big town dreams that I’ve been chasing. Will never come true if I wind up staying.” ~Jason Aldean
When I started telling people in high school that I wanted to go to college in a city, I started getting some strange looks. You know, those looks… the one’s where people think that you want to leave because you are ‘too good for them.’ They think that you don’t join in on their love for the local town, its familiarity, the feeling of being small.
However, I couldn’t have felt more differently about my decision.
“I’m like that AM station. That never comes in right. ’Til you pass the city limit sign. That’s the only time it all gets clear.” ~Jason Aldean
It was never that I “felt too good.” It was that I just couldn’t ignore an unyielding pull towards the city life. It was as-if something within me couldn’t be released without that fast-paced rush, the ability to get a little lost.
“Give me a Sunday morning that’s full of grace. A simple life and I’ll be okay here in small town USA.” ~Justin Moore
But, of course with all things unfamiliar, I still feel that pull back to something that I know. Now, amidst the rush of traffic and the strange street signs, I often times find myself needing the smaller space that I left.
In a world full of changing paces, it’s not surprising that one of my weaknesses is finding a balance between my love for big city dreams and the need to quiet my heart in a small town. The question is, how can I feed my appetite for both?
Don’t you dare go runnin’ down
My little town where I grew up
And I won’t cuss your city lights
If you ain’t ever took a ride around
And cruised right through the heart of my town
Anything you’d say would be a lie We may live our lives a little slower But that don’t mean I wouldn’t be proud to show ya Where I come from. ~Montgomery Gentry
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